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02-07-2025

How to write your wedding vows?

6 min read

Ah, wedding vows. That little moment when you're supposed to summarize your entire love story, your promises for the future, and your inside jokes... in front of everyone. It's moving, it's beautiful, and above all, it's a little scary. Don't panic—you've come to the right place to learn how to write your wedding vows with style, sincerity, and a healthy dose of humanity. You don't have to be Victor Hugo or a punchline machine—just be you. But a somewhat organized you, nonetheless.

Why write your own wedding vows?

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Because we've heard the "classic" vows a thousand times. You know, that famous "I promise to love you for better or for worse, blah blah blah..." — yes, it's nice, but a little impersonal. Writing your own vows is an opportunity to show your other half (and the audience, because yes, there will be an audience) what this relationship means to you, much more than just a wedding dress or a traditional ceremony. And above all, it's a beautiful demonstration of commitment.

It's not just a text to read in front of everyone; it's a declaration of what you're ready to build together. Your words can make people laugh, cry, or even both at the same time. And if you're shy? All the more reason to write something sincere that will speak for you. Even if your voice trembles a little on the big day, your heart will speak loudly.

So, how do we do it? We'll see.

Step 1: Find inspiration without panicking

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Does the blank page scare you? That's normal. But don't jump on ChatGPT (ah, too late). First and foremost, you need to reconnect with what binds you to your partner. And for that, nothing beats a little return to your roots.

Dive back into your story

Your first date, that memorable blunder at the restaurant, the moment you said to yourself, "Okay, this person is the one." These memories are your gold. Write them down, even in bulk. It's not about writing a novel, but about capturing the key moments that define your relationship. The goal isn't to tell your entire story, but to capture the moments that define you.

Get inspired (but don't copy)

It's okay to look at what others have done. Look for greeting videos, read examples, but remember that what works is what comes from you. You don't have to be original at all costs. Emotion will always beat performance.

Take your time

Spoiler: it doesn't happen in an hour. Writing your vows is like marinating a good dish. Let it rest. Come back to it. Reread it. Let it mature. And above all: avoid starting it the night before the wedding, between ironing the shirt and checking the playlist for the last time.

Step 2: Structure without overthinking

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You're not asked to write an essay, but a minimum of organization helps. You don't need a detailed plan, but a common thread, like a well-fitting princess wedding dress , avoids awkward detours or embarrassing blanks.

Introduction: Let's get into the swing of things

Start with a sentence that resonates with you. It can be an anecdote, a direct statement, or even a joke (if it's really good). This is your gateway into the speech.

Example :

“When I met you, I knew right away you were special. Not just because you spilled your coffee on me, but mostly because you apologized and offered me a cookie.”

The heart of the speech: cascading emotions

This is where you talk about what your significant other means to you. What you admire, what you've learned, how you've grown together. Don't be afraid to be vulnerable. A wedding vow is not a job interview.

Also talk about the present: what you're experiencing together today. And of course, open a door to the future: your shared dreams, the challenges ahead, the crazy or very simple projects that await you.

The conclusion: the promises

It's time for big resolutions. No need to turn into a prophet. Make promises that are realistic, sincere, and a little offbeat if that's your thing. "I promise to love you every day" can coexist with "I promise to never watch the next season of our show without you."

Step 3: Know how to balance emotion and humor

That's where it comes down to it. Too serious? We lose interest. Too light? We miss the emotion. The right balance is the one that suits you.

Don't be afraid to move

Yes, some will cry. Maybe even you, in your Mermaid Wedding Dress . So what? A wedding is a concentration of emotions. Open your heart, even if it's uncomfortable. It doesn't happen every day, so you might as well be honest.

Use humor sparingly

Humor is great. But not every other line. Too many jokes, and your greetings sound like a stand-up comedy. One or two well-placed jokes will go a long way than ten heavy-handed puns.

Be sincere, not corny

We want the real thing, not a cardboard Valentine's Day poem. Avoid phrases copied and pasted from Pinterest. Speak as you speak in real life, but with a little more elegance. If you're clumsy, play it up. That's authenticity.

Step 4: Avoid classic pitfalls

Yes, there are. And no, you won't avoid them all without help.

Too long is too long

A good wish lasts between 2 and 4 minutes. Any longer, and even your mother will start looking at her watch. Condense. Focus on the essentials. Have them proofread if necessary to cut out repetitions.

The CV effect

"I am an organized, punctual, and serious person..." No. We're not here for a cover letter. Speak from your heart, not your HR head.

Private jokes

One or two is cute. Ten is awkward for guests. Remember, everyone is listening, not just your other half. So avoid the, "I promise not to call your mom 'the boss' anymore"... unless it's really funny. And meant to be. Likewise, avoid making a comment about the ' Short Wedding Dress ' unless it's something you're really sure about.

Step 5: Reread, repeat, breathe

Even the most beautiful wishes can fall flat when spoken. To avoid stuttering or forgetting your text, plan ahead.

Read aloud again

What comes across well in writing doesn't always translate well to spoken language. Read aloud several times to adjust sentences. Cut out what sounds false, simplify what's too long.

Repeat, but not like a robot

The idea isn't to learn by heart, but to familiarize yourself with your text. Keep an index card if necessary, but master the content so you can look up and speak naturally.

Just breathe

On the big day, take your time. Breathe in. Look at your partner. You're there to share something beautiful, not to take an oral exam.

Some examples of promises that hit the mark

Not sure what to promise? Here are some ideas to inspire you. Adapt them, of course, to suit your style and your relationship.

  • I promise to laugh with you, even when the jokes suck.

  • I promise to support you, even when you want to adopt one more cactus.

  • I promise to always listen to you, even when you're telling that vacation story for the 10th time.

  • I promise not to eat the last square of chocolate... without asking.

  • I promise to pick my battles, except for the thermostat temperature.

What if you panic on the big day?

Don't panic, really. Perfect vows don't exist. There's often a tear, a laugh, a hesitation. And that's fine. Because what matters is you, not your level of eloquence.

And frankly, between us, no one expects an Oscar speech. You're there to say "I love you" with your words, not recite Molière. Your partner expects your sincerity, not a performance. And that's the best part. You can always be inspired by an example you find by chance , but the main thing is that it comes from the heart.

Conclusion: writing your vows is, above all, writing with the heart.

Writing your wedding vows is an act of love. It's not a literary challenge or a romantic competition. It's the moment when you put into words what you feel, what you're experiencing, and what you dream of. There's no need to make everyone cry (although that often happens). Just convey your message with sincerity.

Take your time, let your emotions flow, add a little humor, and above all, be yourself. It's your story, your relationship, your moment. And that's what will make your vows unique.


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